Hello! I’m Robin.
On the 6th November 2019 things changed rather drastically for me. Before that day, I was Robin Hatcher, comedian, amateur cook, gamer and enthusiastic, but entirely talentless DIY attempter. After that day, I was still all of those things but with the brand new tag of ‘MS patient,’ a tag which, I found out to my eternal annoyance, will never leave me.
Receiving the diagnosis was the end of what felt like an incredibly long road, but knowing more now about the diagnosis process for many people, mine was mercifully short. From the first signs of my symptoms until diagnosis was about 9 months. However through that process there was a fairly constant, and worrying thread that it might be spinal cancer so when I was told it was MS, I felt like I breathed a sigh of relief, before inhaling a gasp of sadness at my new situation.
In the first few months, for me anyway, whilst I wanted to get on with my life, and come to terms with my diagnosis, I was instead thrust into the world of constant medical appointments, MRI’s, Lumbar Punctures, conversations about medication, Neurologists, community nurses, hospital nurses, MS nurses, medication nurses and the list goes on and on and on. Every single person in that list was there to help me, and they did an amazing job, but it doesn’t make it any easier. On some days you just want to sit at home with a mac and cheese and pretend everything’s good but your third call that week from a neurologist, this time wanting to discuss the risks of a potentially fatal brain infection linked to medication somewhat puts an edge on an otherwise joyful inhalation of carbs.
Slowly, the new reality began to sink in, helped on by an enforced year of stillness brought on my the pandemic (there weren’t LOADS of comedy gigs happening around then, so work was quiet!) The feelings I felt were a huge range, but the over-arching sensation was a sense of mourning. Mourning the life that I felt I had lost, and instead learning to consider what my life would be now, how things might be different and how I would cope with that. Slowly this feeling began to change into one of determination and acceptance and whilst some days are still garbage and involve me crawling from bed to sofa and watching yet more of the Office before crawling back to bed with a pizza crust hanging out of my mouth, these days are coming less often.
I’m now just over 3 years into this journey and still learning every month more about the condition, how it affects me and how I can best manage it. Each of these three things will be different for everyone with MS, but through a series of blog posts with the wonderful MS together, I am hoping to explore some of the things I’ve found helpful, whilst also moaning about all the stuff which isn’t so easy. I hope you enjoy these inane ramblings, and find a small amount of useful information amongst all the nonsense…I’ll be writing a post in the coming weeks about the Fear of Fomo and how having MS has changed my way of thinking around missing out on fun stuff but in the meantime, do get in touch over on the Facebook group if there’s anything in particular you’d like to read a blog about and I’ll add it to the plan.
Lots of love,
Robin